The disease is not like this

Anthropologist Liu Shaohua, author of "My Liangshan Brothers," uses himself as a field, crossing boundaries to write about illness, memory, and the new life. His mother suffers from dementia, his daughter suffers from cancer, and the physical and mental turmoil of two generations. A relationship that both falls and supports each other varies. After experiencing life and death, he reflects on the care of himself, his family, and society. He learns to be vulnerable to life. This is dedicated to you and me who will eventually face the suffering of old age, illness, and death.
【Content Introduction】
In July 2018, my mother was diagnosed with early-stage Alzheimer's disease, and I was diagnosed with lymphoma. Mother and daughter each faced dramatic life changes, and the family, as a community, shouldered the burden of care. How do we catch a vulnerable person in their fall? How do we rebuild our body and mind, our selves, and our relationships? The "rite of passage" of treatment and recovery is an iterative journey, marked by devastation, pain, and despair, but also by reconstruction, healing, and rebirth.
The five years since my illness have been a journey of experience, forgetting, and reconstruction. Perhaps it's because we all navigate the boundaries of body and mind during life's turbulent transitions, silently adjusting our relationships with ourselves and each other. For the first time in my life, I yearned to understand my mother's thoughts and experiences. At the ferry crossing of cognition, my entire family boarded with her, crossing the boundary between memory and amnesia together. I, too, have emerged from serious illness as a new person, learning to embrace vulnerability and resolving to entrust myself to the practice and exploration of caregiving in the second half of my life.
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【Editor's Recommendation】
🍃 Anthropologists "take themselves as fields" and cross boundaries to write about the two "diseases of the century": pain, memory and rebirth. It is a transitional ritual of life and a rebirth.
Renowned anthropologist Liu Shaohua and her mother were diagnosed with cancer and Alzheimer's disease in quick succession. In the midst of life, both were struck by serious illness. From her dual roles as a scholar and a patient, she chronicles this life journey of mother and daughter. Through illness and care, they reconstruct their bodies and minds, their selves, and their relationships, and learn the virtues of living in the present moment and showing vulnerability.
From comorbidity to symbiosis, a mother and daughter's relationship unfolds, both falling and supporting each other. The mother was once a caring, all-around fitness expert, while the daughter was a world-traveling anthropologist caring for the vulnerable. Overcoming physical and mental pain, these two generations of women rediscovered each other amidst life's turbulent transformations.
"Today, the line between mother and daughter guiding and being guided is becoming increasingly blurred. Parents and children exchange perspectives at different stages of life, and the life relationship they form is like working together to draw a circle and achieve perfection."
🍃 Breaking down taboos and stereotypes surrounding illness, we explore the ethical and practical implications of life and care. How can we reconcile with aging, memory loss, and illness? How can we transform the burden of caregiving into companionship? What kind of care do patients need?
Serious illness is like a magnifying glass on relationships and human nature. Having experienced the ups and downs of human nature, the author has no intention of writing about trauma or glorifying the course of illness. Instead, he focuses on the often-overlooked psychological state and relationship reconstruction of patients, reflecting on the lack of life philosophy and ethical education.
Caregiving is not just an individual matter; it's the responsibility of society as a whole. This exhibition showcases the caregiving network built by multiple stakeholders, including patients, families, medical professionals, care institutions, and policies and regulations.
🍃 A blend of fiction and reality, transcending academic frameworks, this book explores life experiences through everyday details. Each chapter begins with a novelistic approach, describing the daily lives of a mother, Xiaomei, and her daughter, Xiaohua, a story that serves as their life story. The misunderstandings caused by the mother's amnesia, the connections forged between family and friends through food, and the physical skills I acquire during my recovery...
Transcending the limitations of one's own pain and self-narrative, recalling the younger generation's understanding of the life journey of the previous generation, calling on readers to empathize.
🍃The Traditional Chinese version scored 9.1 on Douban, and readers were moved to tears. Medical professor Wang Yifang, caregiver Hu Yong, writer Yu Shi, and doctor Wang Xing sincerely recommended it.
【Recommended by all circles】
How can one escape the quagmire of family co-morbidity? With an anthropologist's perspective and pen, Ms. Liu Shaohua meticulously and delicately documents the poignant experiences of mothers and daughters facing co-morbidity, and the journey of treatment, rescue, and redemption. Her work transcends medical technology to encompass responses and solace to the physical and mental torment, the shrinking of social connections, and the spiritual uncertainty. This book not only challenges the social care system in the age of chronic disease but also tests humanity's resilience in the face of adversity. It is a book worth reading and savoring for all who have experienced or sympathized with life's upheavals and tragedies.
—Wang Yifang, Professor, Peking University School of Medicine. The sufferings of aging, illness, and death are, like birth, a process. Acceptance, which permeates every phase of life, is a cycle of loss and re-gain of meaning. True care can be a profound source of meaning, for withering is almost as important as growth.
—Hu Yong, Professor at the School of Journalism and Communication, Peking University. Illness first compels the patient to learn, then to change their lifestyle, and finally to adjust their relationships with others. It is precisely during illness that the next generation seems to gain a deeper understanding of the life journey of the previous generation. Caregiving inevitably brings chaos at first, but ultimately helps us confirm the existence of love. This book begins with the co-occurrence of illness between mother and daughter, ultimately reaching a symbiotic relationship between mother and daughter. Because through caregiving, we can reach the core of human civilization and fulfill the ultimate dignity of humanity.
——Thus, the writer and translator acts as both a patient and a caregiver. From a very special perspective, the author tells every relative or friend who may visit the patient that what the patient needs most is not courage, but the understanding of living in the present and the virtue of showing weakness.
—Wang Xing, medical science writer

2024-07-01

广西师范大学出版社

mountain

264

9787559869579